and now for something different…

so way back in the day my friend ‘mikey’ and i had a music magazine called move your car. it was a blast reviewing cds and making our own zine, and it had great benefits like meeting bands, free cds and free concert tix. anyways, i haven’t been able to find any copies of my first published works, which has always been kind of sad. so the last time i was home i was really stoked when i found a copy of one of the articles that we had the most fun writing. we spent all day at a newstand ‘reviewing our competition’, which is funny in itself since our circulation never topped 5,000 and these guys were actually on the rack. so here it is, from the rough copy i found in my garage… an official exerpt from move your car #7

myc Reviews the Competition

We were wandering through the magazine racks downtown recently and we noticed some pretty stiff competition in the magazine business. So we’re going to make fun of the rest. Here are some awards we made up, and some random observations we made about a few others. Have fun and see what else you could be reading right now.

Barbie Bazaar

the most bizarre magazine we found


ironically this magazine was only available indoors, printed on paper

Morbid Curiosity

we were wondering…

Your Flesh

hmmm what to do, what to do…

Fireman’s World

for the latest and greatest in the hoses and hydrants


we dropped this one so we had to buy it

Gardens Illustrated

the swimsuit edition comes out in march

The Baffler

we couldn’t quite figure this one out

Family Photo

because staring at your own family pictures isn’t boring enough

Unix Review

pronunciation is the key to this one

Satellite Times

for the stay at home astronaut

American Cheerleader

we were like, gonna buy this one, but we weren’t like fer sure…

Chess Life

in case you missed the coverage of big blue on espn


we weren’t quite sure about this one

best magazine dedicated to a letter:

3. Q

2. a/W (tie)

1. S

most useless magazine

3. Tiki News

2. Make Up artist

1. American Tugboat

best cover model

3. Backwoods Home Magazine

2. Inter Mountain Women

1. Girls of Outlaw Biker Magazine

one word says it all:

3. Blue

2. Might

1. Joop

best magazine dedicated to log cabins:

3. Log Home Living

2. Log Home Design

1. Log Home Illustrated

best overall:

3. Horn World

2. Knit Hooking

1. American Taxidermist

other zines we just couldn’t think of anything to say about, but felt they were worth mentioning:

Inner Ear

Red Herring

Wild Duck Review


Australian Tattoo

Rock & Ice

Various Gun and Weapon magazines (we’re a little too scared to make fun of any by name)


well, i hope you get some laughs from this like we did. one love, one heart.

Author: djiverson

I am a Christian, son, brother, artist and friend. I am blessed to be the Youth & Family Minister at New Vintage Church in San Diego. Know You Are Loved.

comment here:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s